13.0: Legacy of heavy breathing woman
By Gyasi Ross
Ms. White/Black Liberal, with Birkenstocks and turquoise toe rings: >SQUEALS< “Oh my gosh--you’re from the reservation? It must have been so hard! How did you get out? Y’know, I know you hear this all the time, but my mom was part Chickasaw, but she was stolen away by her Uncle Jude who was a dairy farmer and made her bathe in milk every single day until her brown faded away.”
Me, noticing that she does kinda smell like milk and maybe she’s not lying: >Sigh< “You didn’t hear anything else I just said, did you?”
Like Heavy Breathing Woman, these unfamiliar Skins and non-Skins make decisions about our futures--about law enforcement, school programs, health care and housing on the reservations.
Ross thinks his "Heavy Breathing Woman" is an urban Indian who has never visited a rez. Could be, but you don't have to visit a rez to understand the problems. I've visited a few dozen reservations, but only for an hour or a day or two. Most of my knowledge comes from articles and books. Read 50,000 or 100,000 items on Indians and you probably won't have many romantic illusions either.
And let's recall that Ross thinks Pocahontas is a great movie for Native girls. His favorite "Native" actor seems to be Steven Seagal for kicking so many people's butts. In other words, Ross doesn't like Native stereotypes except when he does.
And let's note Ross's apparent disdain for women. He envisions his "Heavy Breathing Woman" as "a short Skin lady who liked smoking her Benson & Hedges and wearing Aquanet bangs with Photochromic tint glasses. He characterizes the person who romanticizes him as "Ms. White/Black Liberal." From his previous posting, we know he doesn't think much of "Short-Haired White Professors" (i.e., feminists or "feminazis"). Apparently his world consists of admirable female relatives, Native beauties who resemble Disney's Pocahontas, and other women who have condescending labels instead of names.
For more of Ross's columns, see Indians Join Military for Paycheck? and No Pride in Native Pride T-Shirts?
Below: A romantic picture of Indian life.
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